Do I really need to lose weight for my wedding day?

Would you ever just randomly ask your friend if they were planning to lose weight? Or, to make things even more awkward, would you ask someone who is practically a stranger? Unless you are one of the more socially forward types, I'm guessing the answer is no.

So why is it, that the second you have an engagement ring on your finger, this suddenly becomes the question that you get asked constantly? Literally...by everyone. From your closest friend to passing strangers, they all seem to want to know what your goal weight is for the big day. Perhaps it comes from a caring standpoint of wanting to help you feel your best on your wedding day and an assumption that shedding a few pounds will get you there. One would certainly like to think so. But I can't help but wonder why? Last time I checked, my fiance was aware that he was not asking a tall, willowy beauty to marry him but instead a chunky, short girl was his choice and he was okay with that. Well I certainly hope so otherwise the ring giving was probably slightly inappropriate! I also imagine that this is generally the case for all couples at this pinnacle moment. From this assumption we can guess that said other half does not hold the expectation or the want for their future bride to be panicking about losing weight before the big day. They love how they look at that moment. They are perfect, just the way they are...in full on Bridget Jones style.

Yet there seems to be such a huge expectation that all brides must be below a certain size for their wedding day. Personally I think the wedding industry itself plays a huge part in this. The fact that the average size of British women these days is a 16 yet the vast majority of bridal shops only carry sample wedding dresses in sizes 8-12 kind of says something. Now to make myself clear, I am not saying that it's wrong to want to lose weight for your wedding day or that bridal shops should only carry larger sizes instead. I simply think that at a time when you should be able to bask in the glow of being loved for exactly who you are, the absolute last thing you should feel is pressure to change how you look.

Now I wasn't one of those girls who always dreamed of her wedding dress. To be honest until my partner proposed I hadn't really even thought of what type of wedding I wanted. But I did at least have a picture in my mind of what the wedding dress search would be like. It would be all smiles and laughs, glasses of champagne and prancing around in an array of gorgeous dresses. Sadly my wedding dress search was a far more stressful experience. Dress after dress that I put on would barely fit over my ample arse, let alone do up. I was encouraged to "imagine" what it would look like but who wants to buy what is probably the most expensive dress you will ever wear based on imagining what it would look like? Not to mention how horribly soul destroying it is to not find a single thing in the shop that will actually fit you. As I have said, I am not the smallest of people but I am certainly not wildly outside of standard sizes. I buy my clothes in high street stores and I don't even need to go to plus size shops so I was utterly bewildered by the fact that I couldn't find a dress that would fit me.

I started to get incredibly worried that I would look awful on my wedding day if I didn't lose weight. I sat and planned what exercise regime I needed to follow, what I would eat for the next two years, how much I could theoretically lose in that time. I joined Weightwatchers and the lady who ran it pronounced that she could have me five dress sizes down before my wedding date. I was then left thinking...oh god, do I need to lose five dress sizes!? Needless to say it wasn't exactly the glowing feeling I was hoping for.

Fast forward a year and a half later and being the rather rubbish dieter that I am I haven't exactly made any huge difference to my weight. Certainly not the five dress sizes I supposedly needed. I had been putting off going for another wedding dress search for such a long time, thinking eventually I would be the size I needed to be before choosing. But then it dawned on me. I have 6 months till my wedding. It's pretty safe to say my body is not going to radically change in that time. Plus the rather obvious need to get a wedding dress on order...thinking of that initially made me panic but slowly I realised actually, screw this! I'm going to find my perfect dress and I'm going to look darn good on my wedding day, dress size be damned.

So in I strolled to a bridal shop. Once again the dresses didn't really fit but this time, smiles and laughter were most definitely present. My mum and my sister were the perfect cheerleaders and the presence of champagne was certainly a pleasant addition...and what happened? I found my perfect dress. Yes I had a momentary wobble that I might still be too big when I looked at the photos of me wearing it. But the more and more I look at these photos the more I think actually, I look pretty good. I think one of the main reasons for that is because I was enjoying myself. I was happy and not standing there thinking about how fat my arms are or how my waist should be smaller or the fact that I'm not the "perfect" size.

So yes, I will be a fat bride but you know what? Who the hell cares. That feeling of acceptance is so freeing. I suddenly feel so much more comfortable about how I will look on my wedding day and I think I will actually look even better for it. After all, what is more attractive than a person brimming with confidence and feeling their best? It doesn't matter what size you are, if you have that glow of happiness you will be a beautiful bride. So if you are reading this right now and have been agonizing over changes you "need" to make before the big day, stop. Just give yourself a second to remember that you do not need to be a certain number on the scale to be beautiful. And for me? The man who's opinion truly matters loves me for who I am and how I look right now and that means more to me than any sample size dress horror ever could.

6 Bridal Makeup Looks and When to Wear Them

If you have made your way to my "About Me" page you will know that I'm currently in the process of planning my wedding. I'll try to refrain from babbling on and on about it to you all but suffice to say I am pretty darn excited! Naturally this has resulted in hours and hours of browsing different makeup styles for the big day so I thought it would be a good idea to put all of my new knowledge into a post for you lovelies! 

I have chosen 6 key looks that I think work really well as bridal makeup, spanning the classic to the utmost dramatic and have split them up into seasons for when each look is best. You'll also find that for each look I've identified a few key makeup products that will help you achieve that particular style. 

What makeup should I wear for a Spring/Summer wedding?

Nude makeup look - for a truly understated look (Image from the Hot Mess Handbook)

Nude 

Now when I say nude, I’m not expecting you to stroll on out there with a completely bare face. Mind you, I have absolutely nothing against this, so if you want to embrace your natural beauty and don’t want to wear any makeup at all then all the power to you. But I suspect if you are here then you’re probably looking to use at least a couple of products. This look is most definitely “all about that base”. It is defined by flawless, natural looking skin without the smallest hint of obvious makeup so a great primer and foundation combination is number one on the list. Given this, if you have any concerns about your skin at all, in all honesty you may want to steer clear of this look. You certainly don’t want to be panicking on your wedding day about the handful of spots that have maliciously turned up and how you are going to keep them covered throughout the day.

A light wash of sheer colour over the eyelids particularly in the inner corners, tightlining the upper lashes at the outer corners, some fake single lashes and a great mascara is all that’s needed on the eyes. The new makeup trend of strobing is perfect for enhancing your bone structure without the heaviness of contouring.

Key products for this look:

1. Giorgio Armani Luminous Silk is a weightless, oil free formula that looks like a second skin.

2. Benefit’s Rollerlash is the perfect option as it’s genius design catches even the smallest of lashes to really enhance what you have, without being overly obvious. 

3. Mac Strobe Cream to luminize the skin and highlight.

Play with bright colours for a fresh look (Image from Around Makeup)

Bright & Colourful

There is nothing like a pop of colour to say Spring/Summer bride. It is such a fresh look and can really brighten your complexion. You can add colour in any number of ways, whether it’s with a bright pink lipstick, an aqua blue eyeshadow or any number of other combinations. The key here though is balance. Using a bright colour is great but too much and you could end up looking like you are off to the circus so bear that in mind if you are considering bright colours on your eyes AND lips. As a general rule, with bright colours I would probably choose either lips or eyes to be bright, with a counterbalance of the other being fairly neutral. Don’t get me wrong, your neutral choice doesn’t need to be completely devoid of colour but a tint is far better than a strong pigment. For the area that you choose to make colourful though, let your imagination run wild! Think gorgeous coral lips and a light brown smokey eye or the latest trend of pink eyeshadow with a neutral lip.

Key products for this look:

1. Tom Ford lipstick in Incorrigible, a bold, fuschia pink lipstick for a splash of colour

2. Cargo Vintage Escape Palette to keep the rest of the look fairly neutral

What makeup can I wear to an Autumn/Winter wedding?

 

Add some drama with a berry lip (Image from daily makeover)

Very Berry

When it comes to Autumn/Winter makeup, I think its pretty fair to say we can up the ante a little. Drop the light, fun colours and go for something more dramatic like a berry or purple lip. It really ties in with the richer, jewel tones that couples often choose for their wedding colours at this time of year, not to mention it looks absolutely fabulous on a variety of skin tones. Since heavier colours are often a little more high maintenance, make sure your lips are in tip top condition leading up to the big day with frequent exfoliation and moisturising. It's also best to go for a moisturising lipstick as they fade more evenly and are easier to top up. Balance this look with a lighter eye and natural but defined brows.

Key products for this look:

1. Dr Lipp Original Nipple Balm for lips will have your pout looking perfect.

2. Estee Lauder Pure Color Envy in Insolent Plum works well for a range of skin tones and is moisturising too.

3. Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Wizz to touch up the brows without making them too heavy.

A smokey eye can work for weddings too! (Make-up by Lora Kelley, Photo by Mireia Cordomi)

Smokey

The smokey eye is a look that many of us have spent some time (read as hours and hours of staring in frustration at my now panda-esque face...just me? oh...) trying to master, it's a pretty big deal. Now more than ever people are clamouring to get on the smokey eye train with the likes of Urban Decay and Too Faced even bringing out full palettes specifically for this glamourous look. But the smokey eye isn't just for a big night out, it can most certainly be used on your wedding day. You just have to work out exactly how to use it. 

For starters, it's probably best to stay away from the traditional matte black look, but outside of that is a world of opportunity. Use bronzes and browns or silvers and greys, you can even add in a slight touch of colour, the possibilities are endless. It's also best to use a good quality eyeshadow primer to keep that stunning look in place, because lets be honest, smokey eyes are gorgeous but aforementioned panda eyes...are not. Just remember the two cardinal rules: Use a highlighter on the inner corner to open up your eyes and for goodness sake, BLEND. Literally like your life depends on it. You think you are done? No...keep blending!

Key products for this look:

1. Urban Decay Naked Smoky Palette gives you a variety of looks in one, any palettes with shade variety will work well though.

2. Urban Decay Primer Potion, yes I know this is the second UD product in a row but this stuff is the holiest of all holy grails.

3. Benefit They're Real Mascara tops off the dramatic look perfectly.

 

Forget the seasons, what makeup can I wear all year round?!

Easy does it for this classic wedding look (Image from valentina d'angela)

Soft and sultry

This is probably the most commonly used look for weddings and is one that can definitely work all year round. Similar to the “Naked” look, it is based around neutral colours but with a little bit more going on. A slightly heavier eyeshadow for the eyes or a more tinted lip can give an edge to your look while still looking fresh faced and elegant. Once again, it is all about looking flawless so make sure you find the right kind of coverage for you. Also focus on finding the perfect highlighters and some soft contouring as this will really help define your features.

Essentially this is the “the best version of you” look, in that when it is done well, there is no part that is overly dramatic in any area of your face, yet your features will be enhanced to perfection. Love your eyes, make them the focus with a touch of extra colour. Extremely proud of your Kylie Jenner lips? Choose a shade that is just that little more colourful than neutral. But the key here is gently does it.

Key products for this look:

1. Mac 31 lashes to make the most of those peepers (no giant spidery lashes allowed here)

2. Laura Mercier Flawless Contouring Palette to define those lovely cheekbones (or slim down my enormous nose!)

3. Nars Orgasm Blush for a natural, healthy glow

Use your favourite red lipstick for a vintage look (Image from vintage makeup guide)

Vintage

This is a look that has really grown in popularity recently with the revival of all things vintage. A glorious red lip and the perfect cat eye definitely hits the spot. Regardless of fashion trends, it is a timeless classic that oozes sophistication and suits any time of year. However, I do think the style of your wedding can influence whether this look is the ideal choice, as I couldn't really imagine a boho beach wedding with this kind of makeup so that's something to consider. 

This look demands attention and as such, it needs to be done right. A wobbly cat eye and feathered lipstick really won't do this look justice so if you are planning on doing it yourself, practice makes perfect...and practicing continously does not make you crazy, it makes you a makeup god, remember that. 

Key products for this look:

1. Benefit They're Real Push-Up Liner for easy application of the perfect cat eye.

2. Mac Ruby Woo Lipstick, possibly the most iconic red lipstick there is.

Rounding up, I think it's important to say that although I have limited certain looks to certain seasons, the thing I truly love about makeup is that at the end of the day, it is art. It's a freedom of expression that we don't always get in other areas of our lives and so sometimes, it's best to just say screw you to the rule book and rock the look you want. The world is your oyster and you have all the colours of the rainbow at your disposal. Plus lets be honest, if there is one day in your life when you should be able to choose exactly what makes you happy, it's your wedding day. So if your choices don't entirely match up to the many, many guides out there but you know that both you and your fiance will love it, that's all that matters.

If you are married, what makeup did you wear on your wedding day? If not, what would be your dream look? My wedding is in February with an Enchanted Forest theme which I think will go perfectly with a berry lip, what do you all think?